Improvements in our lives do not happen on their own…
Seven Questions for the New Year – Part 2
From Caroline’s 2012 Salon
Question Two: How do you want to improve your life this year?
Improvements in our lives do not happen on their own. It’s a funny thing about us humans but we frame the dynamics of life in such a way as to imagine that change in whatever form somehow gets delivered to our door. That is, we don’t realize how much we have to be the initiators in the positive changes we want to see come into our lives.
I, for one, sometimes picture myself with one of those toned bodies that walks out of the gym after a two-hour workout. This is the gym that I belong to, of course, but do I actually go? That would take time … right? So while I would like to improve my body – and who wouldn’t want to improve their body – once again, what am I willing to do to get it?
All of us discussed the dilemma of the improvements we would like to initiate into our lives this year but we focused on how and why we sabotage ourselves somewhere along the line. Relating to the Saboteur archetype is so easy for me as I am a natural at finding excuses not to take my dog on long walks, which she should have given her high energy. Instead, I tend to take the shorter walks because I am always time-driven.
At the end of the day, we agreed that each year of our life was either fated to disintegrate the quality of our life or destined to become better in some way. The choice was ours, and it was a choice. Not to choose, to just let things go along in the same unsatisfactory routines as always is a passive, negative choice that will result in some form of disintegration by the end of the year. Owning that at the beginning of the year highlights your responsibility for how well you take care of yourself and how well you actually care about yourself.
Question Three: What do you want to contribute to your community to make it a better place?
It’s been my experience that not many people think about their place within their community. Parents may get involved in the schools their kids go to, but schools are only a part of one’s community. Community is made up of the people in your neighborhood, schools, churches, local businesses, and the well-being of your neighborhood in general. I had an eye-opening experience when I purchased my home around eight years ago. Prior to that time, I lived in a small townhouse for seven years in the same neighborhood. I only met one neighbor the entire time I lived in a townhouse. Within two weeks of buying my present home, I received a letter from a soon-to-be neighbor welcoming me to the neighborhood and inviting me to be part of a circle of history buffs. I was stunned at the warmth of the letter but also that this person knew I adored history.
As the years went by, being a part of the neighborhood began to feel important to me. I liked knowing my neighbors and talking to people when I walked my dog and knowing the names of the people on the block. I gradually felt a growing sense of responsibility for maintaining an interest in the politics and policies of the local government and the rulings that affect the lives of all us living in the village we share. I decided to upgrade my commitment to the business of our local government, attending the community board meetings and keeping up to date on all the activities that my neighbors actively email about. If they devote so much of their energy to making my neighborhood a special place, then I owe them as much.
Part 3 coming soon…
