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Take Charge of Your Relationships

The Challenges of Relationships

Every relationship you forge has the potential to teach you about yourself and your deeply held views. In fact, there's no better laboratory for self-study than through relationships. Relationships are such a large part of who we are that their dynamics manifest themselves throughout our being. The three major energy centers in the body are the second chakra (control), third chakra (self-esteem) and fourth chakra (emotional power).

Relationships can introduce you to the parts of yourself that might otherwise remain hidden. As a result, relationships can be quite painful; learning about ourselves and facing our own limitations are not things we tend to do with enthusiasm.

We do not meet and become involved with people as the result of some random process. Each of us generates patterns of energy that attract particular people into our lives. Try to view your relationships as "spiritual messengers" bringing to you revelations about your strengths and weaknesses, and providing valuable lessons on your path to consciousness.

Your challenge is to form and maintain relationships that support your development, to rescript unhealthy relationships, and to release those that limit growth. This is not about judging others; it's about honoring the lessons that relationships can teach you--having the courage to respond clearly to their lessons.

Rescripting

Rescripting is a conscious effort to change the way you interact in significant relationships. During this process you can become truly awake to your own thoughts and behaviors, and the forces within you. Here's how to start:

• First, step back and observe your behavioral patterns with as much objectivity as possible, paying particular attention to your body language, the words you use, and the actions you take.
• Ask yourself, "Why do I behave this way and what's in it for me, really?"
• Identify the specific emotional and psychological patterns that are activated within you, and adversely impact certain circumstances and relationships.
• Next, identify the people who bring out these behavioral patterns in you. It should become clear that only specific people bring out these patterns.
• Finally, with pattern, reason and people identified, change the "script" during future encounters--awareness means nothing unless you put action behind it.

Take the next step and examine the four central archetypal forces play out in your relationships.